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Book Freak #30: Simple Ways to Be a Better Communicator

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Simple ways to be a better communicator

Book Freak is a weekly newsletter with cognitive tools you can use to improve the quality of your life.

Leil Lowndes is an expert in techniques for better communication. Here are four pieces of advice from her book, How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships.

Answer questions in a way that sparks a conversation
“Never, ever, give just a one-sentence response to the question, ‘Where are you from?’ Give the asker some fuel for his tank, some fodder for his trough.”

Imitate a parrot
“Never be left speechless again. Like a parrot, simply repeat the last few words your conversation partner says. That puts the ball right back in his or her court, and then all you need to do is listen.”

Save your smile for greater impact
“Don’t flash an immediate smile when you greet someone, as though anyone who walked into your line of sight would be the beneficiary. Instead, look at the other person’s face for a second. Pause. Soak in their persona. Then let a big, warm, responsive smile flood over your face and overflow into your eyes. It will engulf the recipient like a warm wave. The split-second delay convinces people your flooding smile is genuine and only for them.”

Learn to listen
“I always try to turn the spotlight on the other person. Truly confident people often do this. They know they grow more by listening than talking.”

Book Freak is one of four newsletters from Cool Tools Lab (our other three are the Cool Tools Newsletter, Recomendo, and What’s in my bag?).

12/10/19